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July 28, 2004

Fug Trouble

Granted, Tom Sizemore's thuggish, overconfident brand of charisma never really turned my personal crank, but it's still intriguing to note that, just three years ago, he was this:

And now, many moons, rage issues, -[alleged] drug problems, and one girlfriend-beating trial later, he's this:

I guess that's what being an [alleged] complete fist-pounding assrag does for your complexion. He went from being chipper and cocksure and not-that-attractive-but-getting-laid-because-of-his-acting-skills-and-other-intangibles to looking, paraphrasing my friend Carrie, like a hundred miles of bad road replete with widening potholes and some colorful roadkill.

And do you see the crazy? There's [allegedly] crazy in those eyes. He looks a bit like he wants to eat your baby, possibly after he's scalped a few of his fellow inmates and hung their skin-shavings in his cell as a message to the rest of them that he's nobody's bitch now, fuckmothers, so don't you come over here with your soap and your lit cigarettes.

So, I suppose the moral is this: If you're fugly on the inside, you'll be fugly on the outside (also known as, "Don't [allegedly] get mad and [allegedly] beat up your significant other, folks, because you'll wind up on the business end of a skinhead's prison fantasy in no time).

Posted by Heather at 03:56 PM | Permalink

Comments

i didn't no it wuz possible to grow a mole

Posted by: CocoaButta | Mar 18, 2005 7:23:21 PM

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