August 26, 2004
I'm A Slave For Fug
Ma! Billy Ray! Break out the Cheetos and the Two-Buck Chuck, ya heah, 'cuz Cousin-Aunt Britney done near outfugged herself:
Look, Brit, there are some things so easy that even a female Ralph Wiggum like yourself can figure them out. Like underpants. THEY GO UNDER THINGS. Like, say, YOUR PANTS. Underwear is not meant to wrap around your thigh -- it's meant to leave something about your pubic grooming to the imagination -- and it's not meant as a protective measure so that you can wear fugly loose-fitting clothes that fall off your soiled ass, yet not worry about the paparazzi snapping a picture of your (wilted, dying) flower. And see those seams halfway down your shirt? Those are supposed to be BELOW your breasts, not riding so far up above one of them that you're fixin' to get put into some kind of cotton chokehold.
Finally, for the love of god, BRUSH YOUR HAIR.
That is all.
god, she looks like she's fifty
Posted by: nathan | Feb 11, 2005 12:00:27 AM
This has got to be one of the worst pictures of her, or anyone for that matter, I have ever seen. As a Louisiana born girl, I am ashamed she is from my beloved home state. Trust me, we do not all talk and act like this unfortunate misguided girl.
Posted by: Rachel | Mar 3, 2005 9:20:06 AM
Oh sweet Jesus...could you look any more like you just came from your greasy ass hubby's momma's trailer? i think she takes the cake on this one. For the love of God-SHOWER!
Posted by: pink | Mar 3, 2005 12:09:40 PM
Oh my god! She has over 30 million dollars in bank, and she looks like she just got out of bed and walked to the nearest 7/11. She looks like an inbred hillbilly, and she gives all of us rednecks an even worse reputation. What a shame she let this happen to herself!
Posted by: Katie | Mar 26, 2005 10:35:14 AM
She looks like Brett Butler on a bender...
Posted by: anon | Mar 29, 2005 11:25:36 AM
Posted by: Elaine | Mar 30, 2005 5:30:11 AM
When I first moved to California, I tended bar on El Cajon Blvd. in San Diego. (those of you who know that that means please repress the horror and move on) She looks exactly like the hookers that used to come in during the day to get off their feet and hose up on whiskey before stepping back out to give a $20 blowjob in some pee-smelling alley nearby. I am not kidding. kd
Posted by: katie d | Mar 31, 2005 11:21:13 AM
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