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April 25, 2005

Unfuggettable


[Photo courtesy of Daily Celeb.]

"Look, Natalie, sometimes fairy godmothers get tired, okay? Sometimes they're sick and tired of all your whining and crying, and "stepmother" this, "stepsister" that, "oh, well, it's just that the mice made a big dress for me"... Honey, screw the damn rodents, you know what I'm saying? I've been on my feet since 7 a.m., I've had to act perky and sing gibberish songs to depressed maids in kitchens all over this damn globe, I've been turning vegetables into horsepower ALL DAMN NIGHT, and frankly, I need a gin and tonic and a lusty cabana boy. My mojo is spent. So you will TAKE whatever clothing you GET, and LIKE IT, okay? And if you're not back by midnight... well, I won't know the difference, because by then I'll be passed out inside a bottle of Beefeater with Marco and maybe his cousin Brad. But suffice it to say that if there are photos of you in the papers tomorrow wearing nothing but a scrap of an old prom dress and a poster for Bobby Trendy Designs, well, you have no one but yourself to blame."

Posted by Heather at 10:51 AM | Permalink

 

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