Mrs Laguna Fug

"Hey, Paris? Paris? It's Kim. Kimberley. Kimberley STEWART.

Dude, I'm getting married! MARRRRRRIED! To Talan. Talan! Talan Torisisisisisisisisisico, or something, I don't really know what his last name is exactly, but whatever. No. No. TALAN. From Laguna Beach.  No, not that one.  The other one. No, that's Stephen. Yes! I think. I actually am not entirely sure which one I'm marrying, but whatever, I'm SO EXCITED! Also! Oh my God, this is almost better, I got these bitchin' hot slipper boots. They're like fierce and ethnic and they look really really wicked with my baggy leggings and this sweater coat from 2002. I feel AWESOME right now, Paris! Paris? Paris, are you there? Can you hear me? Paris, will you be my bridesmaid? Hello? What? NO. Kristin will NOT be mad at you if you're in my wedding. No! Totally not! You don't even KNOW her, Paris. No, she's just on the TV! We haven't really met her yet! Come on! We're BEST FRIENDS! We're BFF! Remember how I brought you a card after your monkey attacked you? That's LOVE! Please, Paris? I'll let you wear my boots!"