December 19, 2005
Random Fug II
This dress is somewhat unflattering, rather see-through, and wholly hideous -- I mean, lady, I GET IT, you have breasts, and that's great, but if you're so determined to show them off then just call Lil' Kim in prison and ask if you can borrow something -- but there is another reason I wish that this Lina person hadn't worn it.
Quite frankly, her navel scares the life out of me.
[Photo by Daily Celeb.]
That is chapped evil, right there. You are staring into the eye of Satan. Have you ever seen the South Park "Woodland Critter Christmas" episode? If you have, then you'll understand why the words "blood orgy" are so appropriate here. And if you haven't, well, you are figuratively (and in some ways literally) staring at the belly of the beast in this photo. That thing is all monster. Don't stare at it too long, or you'll be compelled to drink the blood of a righteous woman while carving pentagrams into the walls.
What is it planning? Why did it insist on rending a gaping hole into this dress, forcing Lina to go outside in something that does not show her off to her best advantage? Was it hoping to cross paths with a jewelry-toting hobbit? Was it trying to blink a message to the TomKat fetus? Was it hoping to brainwash her into going to a screening of Just Friends, so that Lucifer could use The Eye to gaze upon his most recent cinematic handiwork? What? WHAT? WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH US?