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January 09, 2006

Random Fug: Ashley Tisdale

One of the faux-Peldon sisters is at it again:

Oh, toxic little Tisdale starlet, were you even cognizant during the '80s? For half of it you were but a gleam in the milkman's eye; only come 1985 were you even out of utero, and still you were bawling, bald, and blissfully ignorant of your surroundings. From there on up to 1990 you were pretty much stuck on learning to walk, talk, read, and use the bathroom. So maybe you don't know any better.

That's why we're here. Let us help you. Okay: Remember when you get together with your friends and rented Can't Buy Me Love, just to try and wrap your brains around how that hottie Patrick Dempsey could possibly be so old that he's been famous your entire life, and you get tripped up by those crazy "costumes"? And you watched Better Off Dead because you really liked John Cusack in Serendipity and that dog movie with Diane Lane, and yeah, you laughed, but mostly you spent the whole movie trying to figure out what the French girl was wearing because you know it's not terribly flattering and that she needs a new haircut? And remember the month you had mono and you got sucked into Full House reruns on TBS, and learned that the Olsen Twins really have been acting since they were embryos -- and, seriously, could somebody please tell that Kimmy kid that she's way too skinny for those leggings?

That is you in this photo. All of that is you.

Except for the hair -- that is pure Hilary Duff. And although she is Of Today, it really doesn't make that outfit au courant.

Posted by Heather at 12:55 PM | Permalink


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