Achy-Breaky Fug

Somehow, this is starting to feel like Pick On The Under-18s Week here at GFY HQ, which is not really our intent -- it's just unfortunate timing that one kid started wearing pirate costumes around town the same week that the lovely young Miley Cyrus, spawn of The Achy-Breaky Mullet King himself, got talked into a semi-disastrous shirt.

I could have swallowed this, were it not for the lace shower cap that appears to have been lazily stapled to her top. That thing ruins Miley's getup on a few levels:

1) Up close it looks like an As Seen On TV! napkin invention -- The Lapkin, or something -- that attaches to your clothes so that whenever you sit, it falls perfectly into your lap, thereby a) removing the pesky need to remember to unfold the one on the table, and b) preventing untimely accidents wherein your serviette slides indelicately off of your lap, and to fetch it you're forced to lean down and reach so far away that you accidentally tip out of the chair, coming crashing to the ground in front of your sister's boyfriend, whom you've just met for the first time that night, and who is considering proposing provided that the potential in-laws aren't deranged, fanged hill folk with an equilibrium problem (not that I would know ANYTHING about that kind of incident);

2) From far away...

... she looks like she's sporting the biggest, most skydiving-conducive pair of granny panties ever sewn.

Oh, Miley. You have such a nice smile, and we're rooting for you, we really are. Just maybe think about cutting back on the hoo-ha next time.