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November 22, 2006

AMA Fug Carpet: Nelly Furtado

Am I the only person baffled by how Nelly Furtado insists on stomping around with her face twisted into such sour contortions that it appears she is plagued by a foul stench?

Tight cheeks, pursed lips, squinty eyes, tense jaw... something's amiss. What's the whiff, Nelly? Whither the pong?

Is it that your InstaBangs still smell like the bag they came in? Is the carpet moldy? Is the girl behind you looking away because she did something of which she is now a bit ashamed?

Maybe you just forgot to take off your WhiteStrips -- or, tragically, never remembered to put them on in the first place. Perhaps you're sucking on a sour Jolly Rancher. Holding a lit cigarette in your mouth that you're trying to hide from prying lenses. Secreting a razor blade that you can spit out lightning-fast at your enemies once inside. Trying not to cry because you just bit your tongue, or your shoes hurt, or somebody just shouted out, "And what will you be skating to tonight -- the theme from Ice Castles?"

Or ... are you just naturally a teeny bit smarmy?

Please advise.

Posted by Heather at 10:26 AM in Misc. Awards Shows | Permalink


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