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November 02, 2006


Que? Why do you look at me this way? You've never seen a woman in a red origami minidress before? Bah! Next you're going to tell me it's not normal for a man to drink paint thinner like it's milk! Hahahahahaha! So stop with the sass, little bitch Garners, because the only thing that gives my Marc more seconds of pure half-strength than paint thinner is the sight of me in what he calls my sexy blood clot outfit! He is the teeeeny pequenito stick of celery in my giant Bloody Mary and he LOVES when I say that because it gets him all hot and bothered and he has to go suck on a tomato for two hours, which is what he usually does when he gets excited. Well, when he's not doing ME! For TWO WHOLE MINUTES! OH, YES, THAT IS RIGHT, JUDGY TYPES! So STICK THAT IN YOUR CAMERA and EAT IT!

Posted by Heather at 08:26 AM in Jennifer Lopez | Permalink


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