February 22, 2007
Lady Victoria Fugvey
Occasional fug-victim Lady Victoria Hervey has reappeared at a recent party Radar magazine threw here in Los Angeles:
She's so colorful and festive, like a pinata! A pinata in a dress that really, really makes me want to run over to her, distract her with something shiny, and then quickly adjust her straps so that she doesn't flash the entire party when she leans over the buffet table to grab some mini quiches. The way this fits, too, it wouldn't just be a boob-flash, I fear -- we would be able to see from sternum to shoes, and if there's one thing we've had enough of around these parts, it's flashing. In fact, I'd like to declare a moratorium on accidental-on-purpose nudity at least through the rest of the awards season. A girl just needs a break from nip slips, crotch shots, bum cracks, and what I fear is the next step in this staircase to total public nakedry, wang peeks. I mean it: I appreciate the male form as much as any other girl, but if C-list man-starlets start strutting around in loose-fitting dolphin shorts or something, I will just lose it. So, please, Celebrity America. For the next few days, please keep your personal business under wraps. That includes making sure that your bodice hasn't drooped so far down your chest that we're a half-second away from being able to flick a Red Hot into your navel. Thank you.
Posted by Jessica at 12:39 PM | Permalink