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May 24, 2007

Fuggy Jackson

"So, yo yo yo, dawg, let me tell you something.... here's the thing, dawg, here's the thing:

"Yo, look, man, here it is: I like that you came out here and did your thing. This is all about taking risks. But for me, dawg, I don't know, the fit is only all right for me -- that thread hanging out of your middle button hole is a little pitchy, and embroidery-wise, it's not that strong either, man. I don't know, it looks like you went to Wild Pete's Olde Cowboy Wearhouse and Moonshine Saloon, where a Joanie Stubbs-type ripped patches out of her favorite dress and sewed them to your sleeves for good luck. I'm not sure it's enough tonight, dawg, it's a big night and you needed to bring your best and I don't think that did it right there. But you did your thing. Paula?"

"Listen, you both are heroes -- BOTH sleeves. I can't pick just one. This night is about shining and gravy, and both of those things are on the plate and all I can do is clap, because I do believe in ferry boats."

"I THINK what Paula is TRYING to say is, that jacket is an ABsolute MESS."

Posted by Heather at 12:42 PM | Permalink


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