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June 25, 2007

Gastonfugly

Great Britain's Glastonbury music festival looks kind of like a muddy delight, especially considering that most of the music festivals here in Southern California require an acceptance of the inevitability of severe sun/heat stroke.  However, the seriously inclement weather there this year has lead to some intriguing fashion choices.

Kate Moss, of course, somehow manages to look glamourous despite: trawling through metric tons of muck; living in a trailer for days on end; and accessorizing with the Doherty. I have never seen a photo of him where he appears to have bathed within the last six weeks, or with his mouth closed. While her ability to style herself is remarkable (now I kind of want PVC pants, despite knowing with complete confidence that I absolutely can not pull off PVC pants), her taste in dudes is questionable:

What is not questionable is that Shirley "Goldfinger" Bassey is AWESOME:

If you are Shirley Bassey, and you have to wear wellies, damn straight you get them BeDazzeled. Because you are fabulous, and if my cellular provider offered "Goldfinger" as a ring tone, you would now be like .0004 cents richer, because I would have just bought it.  Speaking of buying things, let us all also give thanks that Shirley didn't buy the farm when her helicopter almost crashed this weekend.

And then there's Stella McCartney, lover of animals, maker of allegedly really nice organic beauty products, and virulent hater of Heather Mills. Despite the kajillions of dollars and the famous father and the friendship with Gwyneth, I like to think that Stella is the most Regular Type Girl of the celebrities at Glastonbury, no?

Yes, I am pretty sure this is exactly what my pale ass would look like if, in the comfort of my fancy Glastonbury VIP trailer I turned to my husband and said, "Have you seen my raincoat?" and he said, "what raincoat?" and I said, "you know. MY RAINCOAT. My yellow raincoat. I asked you to pack it," and he said, "I didn't pack your yellow raincoat. I didn't pack any raincoats. Why would I pack a raincoat?" and I said, "It's raining!" and he said, "I don't know," and I said, "well, god. Now I'm going to get all wet," and he said, "shit, babe. I'm sorry," and I said, "oh, god. I guess it's not that big of a deal. I have this weird tarp-y dress thing I got in a promotional packet. It's got these random, inexplicable holes in the shoulders, but it ought to keep me pretty dry, if I can find a hat. But I don't think I shall wear pants," and he said, "but what am I going to wear?" and I said," I guess you'll just have to suffer."

Posted by Jessica at 01:13 PM | Permalink

 

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