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July 26, 2007

The Fug Identity

JULIA STILES: I'm so miserable.

MATT DAMON: I'm just looking at my wife over there.

JULIA: All these undergarments -- count them, Matt! I'm wearing like TWELVE OF THEM.

MATT: I can't...I don't think I should do that.

JULIA: And you can STILL see my underwear.

MATT: And...other stuff. Maybe. I'm not looking.

JULIA: What are you talking about?

MATT: I mean, maybe it's just a really big freckle. On your boob. Not that I looked. At your boob. Let's just get this over with, okay?

JULIA: YOU CAN NOT SEE MY NIPPLE.

MATT: Maybe. I'm not looking. But the whole thing, it's pretty sheer. I'm just saying. It might be happening. I don't want to stare at your boob to make sure.

JULIA: I can not BELIEVE this is happening.

MATT: It is pretty awkward. I hear nude, lined undergarments can help.

JULIA: Where did you hear that?

MATT: I read things, okay? Sometimes I like to read InStyle while they're doing my make-up. If Ben's in there, I can make fun of him for weeks.

JULIA: And now you're making fun of ME? THAT'S JUST GREAT.

MATT: I'm not making fun of you! I'm trying to help.

JULIA: That's it. I'm retiring. Effective immediately.

MATT: Come on, now. This can't be nearly as embarrassing as Down to You was.

JULIA: You have a point.

Posted by Jessica at 12:30 PM | Permalink

 

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