Lion For Fugs

TOM CRUISE: Ladies and gentleman! If I may draw your attention to the center ring! Her torso is longer than my entire body! I've haven't yet figured out how to force her to wear flats all the time! At home, I sometimes secretly call her Long Arms McGee! KATIE HOLMES!

KATIE HOLMES: This is so embarrassing, Tom. I'm not your Real Doll.

TOM: You kind of look like one! A really EXPENSIVE one. And I called you Katie! Katie Holmes! Wasn't that nice of me? Are my bangs too severe?

KATIE: I wish you wouldn't parade me around like this. It makes it hard for me to pull up my dress. Also, does it look like they somehow attached the skirt part of this thing backward? There's like this weird front bustle, and I can't figure....

TOM: My bangs, Katie! You didn't answer my question about my bangs! I took in a picture of Lily Allen to the hairdresser! Do you think I went too far?

KATIE: I'm beginning to think this whole thing has gone too far.

TOM: MARVEL AT OUR SHINY SHOES! BEHOLD --

KATIE: Oh my god, can we just go inside now?