October 17, 2007
You know what's really NOT tacky, like, at ALL? Romancing the cameras at your awareness-raising World Hunger fundraiser -- which you are holding at a Taco Bell, presumably because you think that will convince people to run for the border... of blighted nations, with bags of burritos in their hands -- by pulling goofy, facetious poses and shoveling said burritos into your mouths as if to say, "Okaaay, I GUESS I'll eat now... I don't even really NEED to, but I will because I CAN, and it's HILARIOUS!"
It's a photo that's very fug... of spirit, tainting an otherwise important cause. Although maybe Heidi or Spencer will manage to get a giant refried-bean stain on either of their outfits, thus giving it that kicky wardrobe-trouble angle also. Although, wait, are those little felt PAW PRINTS on Heidi's dress, or is that one in the center just an unfortunately canine-looking yet totally random collection of dots?
Also, I hate to say it, because he makes me want to draw his face on a balloon and then pop it with my stiletto, but Spencer -- for all his aura of being a giant windbag full of the stankest air -- has made a very dapper choice in his suit.
I just realized "dapper" anagrams to "rapped," which is what he did on Heidi's hilarious single, to equally amusing effect. Although that has nothing to do with anything, but this whole post is already veering off-topic so why not keep going? How are the kids? Did you ever beat the Armageddon level on Snood? And how can they kill off John Black on Days Of Our Lives while he's wrapped in head bandages, thus giving us no time to say a proper goodbye to Drake Hogestyn's Irresistably Incredibly Incomprehensibly Amazing Eyebrow of Shock/Terror/Amusement/Boredom/Vengefulness/Arousal? I mean, talk about a fugly thing to do, NBC. If we don't get a cocked-brow montage by the time John draws his last breath, I am going to... sit here and think unpleasant thoughts for five minutes before catching up on Bionic Woman. TRUST ME, YOU DON'T WANT THAT. And, frankly, neither do I -- Bionic Woman is terrible.
That is all.
Posted by Heather at 12:05 PM | Permalink