November 15, 2007
KRISTEN: HI THERE!
HAYDEN: Hey there, Kristen... um... that's an interesting look.
KRISTEN: Let's be friends! We have so much in common. We're both tiny. We're both blonde. We're both wearing black and white. We're THE SAME.
HAYDEN: Not quite the same, maybe, though, huh? For one thing... no offense but I look kind of great.
KRISTEN: But... but I don't look stumpy!
HAYDEN: No, but the ruffle is not good, hon. It looks like a terrible bib.
KRISTEN: What? SHUT UP.
HAYDEN: I'm just trying to help. I see where you were GOING with it, but it just kind of looks like you were sniffing glue one night and decided to use it on one of your little black dresses.
KRISTEN: I don't have to put up with this. I'M GOING TO GET YOU FIRED.
HAYDEN: Good luck with that. What with them saying "Claire is the key" a lot lately and making a whole SLOGAN about how they couldn't save the world without saving me first, well, I am pretty sure they are going to laugh in your face, babe.
KRISTEN: OH, well, THEY WILL COME AROUND. Once I pitch them my promo package where they show clips of me being all sparky while "Electric Youth" by Debbie Gibson plays in the background, I will be the queen of the show and you will be FIRED and I will clean out your trailer myself with this dress.
HAYDEN: That's fitting, since I'm pretty sure the bib ruffle cost you about as much as a rag. Have fun! I'm going to go take some pictures with Milo that will make people think we might be dating, so that we can deny it some more.
KRISTEN: Oh yeah? Well I'm going to go find Evil Sexy Sark because WE are dating ALLEGEDLY and he is way hotter and more interesting, and his fake accent will make the whole world's loins explode.
HAYDEN: You have a point there.
KRISTEN: You will never beat me, little girl. GAME SET AND MATCH to ME. Bib and all.