Fuggifer Missoni

Socialite Jennifer Missoni (of the Missoni Missonis. Wow, that word has lost all meaning for me after writing it three times) is really very cute, right? So cute:

I think the dress is cute, and I even rather like her Ceremonial Breastplate Necklace. But I have one question for you: are thick old-school pantyhose back?! PLEASE SAY NO. Thick, ice-skater style hose remind me of several moments in my life I'd rather forget: my horrible first job out of college, at which I was not ALLOWED to wear pants, despite the fact that I had to do a lot of climbing of ladders and such; a church function I was dragged to against my will by an individual who will remain nameless, because I truly believe that she had no idea the event was going to include a long talk about how everyone should be trying to convert the "heathens"; and the summer I was experiencing a life-crisis which culminated in my making a list of pros and cons as to whether or not I should join the FBI, which was recruiting at the time. On the "pros" side were perks like, "when I go to pick up my friends, I can pound on their door yelling, "OPEN UP, MOTHERF'ER! IT'S THE FBI!", and the possibility that my partner might be David Duchnovy-esque. On the "cons" side was, in addition to the possibility of my being shot, "probably have to wear pantyhose."

I can not bear to revisit those dark, strange, frustrating days. Please tell me they're not upon us once more.

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