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March 31, 2008
Fug Madness 2008: Bjork, "Elite Eight" Round
(1) MISCHA BARTON vs. (3) PARIS HILTON
Oh, these two. These two wacky kids. They've shared so much: boys, booths at Hyde, a dramatic ping-ponging back and forth from looking like Crazy on a Hanger and Hey! Kind of Pretty. Like so:
Bored. But cute! (I like polka dots.)
But then...
Yeah. I hope she's pointing at whomever sold her this mismatched monstrosity and saying, "YOU! I AM COMING FOR YOU. I LOOK LIKE A BAD AFTERNOON WITH FASHION PLATES." But she's probably just picking that evening's escort out of the crowd.
And then there's Cooper. Looking at her photos, I was struck -- as I often am with her -- by how truly pretty she is. And she often looks very pretty indeed:
And then again, sometimes not:
WTF, sugarplum? This isn't the first time I've seen this -- it's in the book -- but I find it as reminiscent of a first grader as costumed by ABBA as I did then. God, the shared, life-long doubles tennis match between Fine and Fug between these two is giving me a terrible crick in the neck.
Posted by H & J at 10:00 AM in Fug Madness | Permalink
Comments
These really are getting soul-searching hard! I'm going with Mischa based on the 'should know better' standard.
Posted by: steph | Mar 31, 2008 10:04:53 AM
Paris, Paris, ALL THE WAY. At least Misch is capable of looking classy and cute and human when she feels like it, although sometimes in need of a shower, whereas Paz always appears to have been assembled in some sort of factory. A really expensive but ugly factory.
Posted by: Moya | Mar 31, 2008 10:06:41 AM
Paris. It's all Paris. I mean, she SHOPS FOR A LIVING, for jeebus' sake! Her fug is an affront to our senses as well as her family legacy. And it's not hereditary - Nicki looks quite nice, quite often.
Posted by: Lorraine Bates | Mar 31, 2008 10:06:44 AM
Paris can never NOT be Fug. Ever. Nuff said.
Posted by: Loob | Mar 31, 2008 10:07:06 AM
I actually really want that bodysuit Mischa is wearing... it's just weird with the gold underneath, I SWEAR. Plus, Paris's existence fugs up my life, and everyone elses, so I hope she wins this, and then the prize is that I NEVER HAVE TO SEE THEM AGAIN.
(side note: if an Olsen, Chloe Sevigny or Lindsay wins, that rule will no longer apply. )
Posted by: Maz | Mar 31, 2008 10:07:27 AM
So positive am I, in fact, that I wrote in *P.Hilt* in blue pen several days ago. ;)
Posted by: Loob | Mar 31, 2008 10:09:42 AM
mischa just seems misguided - good intentioned, but misguided. paris revels in it - everything about her is fug. personality, reputation, activities, attitude, friends. she's just gross. mischa seems kinda sweet, and at least her color palate is usually reasonable.
Posted by: elisabeth | Mar 31, 2008 10:10:48 AM
People hate Paris obviously, but the difference between the two is that at least Paris tries to look cute (whether she succeeds is a different issue). Misha suffers from the Chloe Sevigny "I-think-I'm-so-forward-anything-I-throw-on-is-a-fashion-statement" syndrome. Not to be confused with the Cameron Diaz "I-think-I'm-so-hot-I-don't-have-to-try" syndrome...
Posted by: Iz | Mar 31, 2008 10:11:54 AM
Sweet Jeebus, Paris should know better! She shops for a living (thanks, Lorraine), and goes to all the fashion shows. No excuse. She gets my vote.
Posted by: mrs o | Mar 31, 2008 10:11:55 AM
No matter how deserving, I cannot vote for Paris, I cannot be part of anything that causes her anymore undeserved attention. I think her picture should definitively be in the dictionary next to "media whore". I will be very sad if somehow she wins this whole thing. Because she'll just print up a new dress with "Paris is the ultimate fug" printed on it over her lady parts and get her picture taken by 200 paparazzi.
Posted by: judy jetson | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:15 AM
Maybe it's just lingering hatred of the whole Marissa Cooper/Ryan Atwood relationship plotline, not to mention the horrible, unflattering clam diggers she wore a number of times on the first few episodes of The OC, as though she wouldn't get a resounding "Ew!" from Summer for wearing the same pants more than once ever, but I have to go with Mischa here.
With Paris Hilton, I feel like taking an "if you ignore her, maybe she'll go away" approach to this. I'm sure she'd be honored if she won Fug Madness, and who wants to give her that satisfaction?
Posted by: Claire | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:18 AM
Paris IS fug.
Hey, remember that Carl's Junior ad she did?
Posted by: Z | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:24 AM
I think it kind of insults the likes of Tara Reid that Mischa got this far at all, but I realise that it's partially the luck of the competitor's draw.
Posted by: Loob | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:36 AM
These really are getting soul-searching hard! I'm going with Mischa based on the 'should know better' standard.
Posted by: steph | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:43 AM
I seem to be going with the underdogs this morning, but I have seen far too many Mischa mistakes to give her a pass. And I cannot find it in my heart or my index finger to vote for anything Paris Hilton.
Posted by: Cecily | Mar 31, 2008 10:12:50 AM
No, please don't vote for Paris Hilton! I don't want her to win! We should just ignore her until she goes away. If you see her on the street, shut your eyes, stick your fingers in your ears, and sing "Blitzkrieg Bop" really loudly.
Posted by: Tabula Swift | Mar 31, 2008 10:14:11 AM
Tough choice. I choose Paris because when Mischa strays it at least looks like she was trying to be creative or edgy or something. But when Paris fugs, her thought seems to be only on "Do I look skanky enough? Would I do me?"
Posted by: susan | Mar 31, 2008 10:14:44 AM
Mischa all the way...not only should she know better but she's actually created terrible trends like the high-waisted pants.
Posted by: D | Mar 31, 2008 10:15:58 AM
Oh, and to all who fears Paris winning Fug Madness, do not forget Chloe and of course, the God of Fug, Bai Ling!
Posted by: Z | Mar 31, 2008 10:16:31 AM
Um, GUYS. No matter what Paris looks like on a bad day, she has never worn HIGH WAISTED MOM JEANS! It has to be The Barton!
Posted by: Genevieve | Mar 31, 2008 10:17:57 AM
I have to vote for Mischa. Paris--I think--cultivates an over-the-top image in which being batshitcrazyfugly all the time is sort of par for the course. Mischa, however, seems to think she's a fashion icon. But seriously--the high-waisted pants, floppy mumus (is it a dress or a shirt?) and scuzzy-fuzzy hair. Major fug.
Posted by: Lindy | Mar 31, 2008 10:19:48 AM
easy one - PARIS. what i am DREADING is the face off between the sev and bai ling. both such high preistesses of fug. i mean, how am i supposed to really choose?!
Posted by: sophia | Mar 31, 2008 10:19:58 AM
I agree with everyone who said that Paris should not get any more attention. And Mischa fugs it up so often, I forget how pretty she is, as the Fug Girls mention. I think any celebrity who looks like she stumbled out of bed the morning after an impromptu dorm party and headed straight for Starbucks without changing or showering or brushing her hair or maybe even her teeth deserves to win over Paris Hilton, who needs to just go away already. PLEASE.
Posted by: lesli | Mar 31, 2008 10:21:27 AM
I agree, Elisabeth. I think these two are evenly matched sartorially. Their hits are SO few & far between compared to their misses. While I'd venture to say Mischa has the fuglier daytime wardrobe (all the high-waisted shorts are seared into my memory) I've gotta vote for P.Hilt because she is really the Embodiment of Fug.
Whereas Mischa seems *relatively* unassuming, Paris *actually thinks* we should adore her and worship her and want to wear her likeness across our chests. This girl convinced half the world that she came up with "That's hot" on her own. Ugh, she's vile. Plus all the nasty clothes. Fug fug fug.
Paris could go all the way [insert requisite related jokes here].
Posted by: Beth | Mar 31, 2008 10:22:09 AM
I have to go with the Barton on this. She walks around looking completely wackadoo and yet we are told by all sorts of people that she is supposed to be so fashionable and wears clothes so well, blah blah blah. Well, I don't care how fashionable it is - if its fug its fug. And she's responsible for bringing highwaisted pants back which look terrible on her and everyone else. As for Hilton, yeah she can't seem to dress herself either, but at least no one is claiming her to be some pillar of great fashion that we should all aspire to.
Posted by: kate johnson | Mar 31, 2008 10:22:59 AM
Fashion Plates! OMG I loved, loved, loved those things!
Haven't thought about those in years.
Paris wins.
Posted by: StacyH | Mar 31, 2008 10:23:22 AM
You know Paris wants you to lock-in that 69%
Posted by: Loob | Mar 31, 2008 10:23:22 AM
p.s. this hurts, but I kind of covet that dress that P.Hilt has on in the "good" photo. not that exact dress, mind you, but one exactly like it ;)
Posted by: Beth | Mar 31, 2008 10:24:22 AM
This took a lot of internal debate.
I feel like Paris knows good and well where the fashion lines between costume and legitimate outfit are, and might flirt with that line sometimes [insert your preferred sexual joke here], but then goes completely past it.
Mischa seems to oscillate between clueless and adorable. Probably unknowingly.
Which fug is worse is debatable. But I went with the blatant, in your face fug of Paris.
Posted by: Amy | Mar 31, 2008 10:26:15 AM
I had to vote Paris. The girl has been able to afford designer clothes all of her life, and yet, a majority of the time, seems like she dressed in the dark upside down.
Posted by: Victoria | Mar 31, 2008 10:26:48 AM
Mischa. She really is genetically blessed and just squanders it.
Posted by: Kate | Mar 31, 2008 10:30:22 AM
Your reference to Fashion Plates made me spit oatmeal at my computer screen.
God, I feel so old.
Posted by: Jenny | Mar 31, 2008 10:31:33 AM
Drat! I had already voted for Paris because her very existence is fugly, and a blemish on the face of humanity, when I read the very good arguments for not voting for her to deprive her of yet more celebrity. Because clearly for her, any attention is good attention. I was wrong!
But she's still fugly of soul.
Posted by: drdan | Mar 31, 2008 10:34:10 AM
Mischa is too unpredictable. I barely recognize her from photo to photo. If you try out every look and style, you're bound to look okay every once in a while. Paris's style on the other hand, tends to be pretty offensive to the senses, but at least she knows what works on her (kind of).
Posted by: Candice | Mar 31, 2008 10:34:29 AM
I know I'm supposed to be voting or thinking about how I'll vote or something, but right now I'm just awash in another wave of adoration for the Fug girls. Fashion plates! What an inspired cultural reference! I am back in my old living room on green shag carpeting with my fashion plates and colored pencils as we speak. No wonder the girls have Intern George wrapped around their little fingers...
Posted by: happy panda | Mar 31, 2008 10:34:46 AM
Please, people. There really, when you come down to it, isn't a contest. As many other GFY alumnae/i (Yes, I'm a Latin geek) have said before me, Paris Hilton WEARS CLOTHES WITH HER FACE ON THEM. Also, the "aren't you jealous?" attitude is often prominent in her fugitude, which adds more fug to the equation (See "Sevigny, Chloe"). Mischa Barton certainly has the fug factor, but... I mean, come on. It's obvious.
(That being said, I love the polka dots.)
Posted by: Sophie | Mar 31, 2008 10:35:02 AM
Much as I hate to see Paris win anything, I have a little scene playing out in my head where whoever's job it is in her publicist's office to follow blogs finds out she's won Fugliest and decides to tell her just to see what happens, and Paris getting all excited about it and throwing a party.
Paris revels in the fug. At least occasionally Mischa looks embarrassed.
Posted by: Becca | Mar 31, 2008 10:35:43 AM
Oh, and I forgot to say: I LOVE FASHION PLATES! (no, seriously, I do. Sweet memories...)
Posted by: Sophie | Mar 31, 2008 10:35:59 AM
The difference here is that, clearly, Paris not peddles drag queen-sized tacky pumps, she also has fug of the soul. A perma-fug that can never be un-fugged. Mischa is herself, no matter how unflattering that may be, and I don't see a deep-down fug like I do in Paris.
Gooooo Paris!
Posted by: Sophie | Mar 31, 2008 10:37:24 AM
You hot bitches are so good I can not decide on the fug. But after some deliberation I have decided that Paris reigns. Mischa just doesn't seem to care and is having trouble releasing the thrift store monkey from her back. Paris? Well, Paris cares too much hence why everyone is "jealous" of her. If Miss Hilton didn't have the green to support her need of trying too hard, she would be in floral stretch pants with matching neon halter and platform espadrilles, snapping her gum while teasing hair in Dina's salon south of Southbeach.
Posted by: Batmamma | Mar 31, 2008 10:40:13 AM
I'm actually really shocked that so many people are so passionate about Paris being the clear winner of this matchup. Mischa was the obvious choice for me. All those shapeless dresses! And the high-waisted everything! Paris has made some pretty ridiculous choices, yes, but at least when I see pictures of her on the street she usually looks semi-put-together. When I see pictures of Mischa I just think "oh, look at that, she picked up the pile of clothes on her floor and put them all on. Together. With bad shoes."
Posted by: J | Mar 31, 2008 10:48:30 AM
NO NO NO!!! Paris must be stopped- vote for MB!
Posted by: Jenn | Mar 31, 2008 10:53:42 AM
I see Paris is in the lead right now but I voted for Misch-matched because I think all those short skirts and shorts have allowed a draft to her brain.
Poor thing.
Posted by: Jenn C | Mar 31, 2008 10:56:40 AM
I'm with all the folks who just want Paris to go away...I've said a number of times, a person should be famous for more than just "being" fug.....or just "being" famous, so let's not perpetuate.....
Mischa....I like it that she sometimes looks....very fug...it's almost a gene, like being clumsy or something.
Posted by: Lisa | Mar 31, 2008 10:57:09 AM
To all those wishing P. would disappear -
aren't you kind of excited to see the diary entry that goes with the fug madness victory party?
Posted by: susan | Mar 31, 2008 10:57:34 AM
Has to go to the M -girl. Paris is fug but at least it's a higher class of fug. Mischa...oh girl, just stop trying so damned hard and maybe life would be OK! It shows when she's put a lot of thought into something because it just comes out so much more fug then if she settled with the cute skirt and top she tried on first before the rest of the closet ended up on the bed.
and this was really hard to type with a cat trying to rest it's head on my fingers.
Posted by: Kattybitch | Mar 31, 2008 10:57:59 AM
P. Hilt had me at fingerless mini-glove.
Posted by: lelo | Mar 31, 2008 10:59:15 AM
PARIS: a total fug of the soul especially when one considers the whole panty issue. Her naked ya-ya is fug. Ugh.
Posted by: ElizaB | Mar 31, 2008 11:00:21 AM
I think this is actually one of the weaker divisions. Up against Stone, Peldon or Posh, either of these two would WITHER. The difference between these two is that Barton looks bad *by mistake* and on the rare occasions that Paris looks good it's *by mistake*. sadly, my vote goes to Paris.
Posted by: Jola | Mar 31, 2008 11:00:54 AM
Paris, without a doubt. She repeatedly goes out in public wearing tops emblazoned with photos of herself. And that stupid BM ring. And, Kattybitch, I'm with you on the fingerless gloves. Horrific.
Posted by: Sian | Mar 31, 2008 11:03:01 AM
I somewhat agree with Jola. Paris looks good by mistake. But that's just the thing, Paris doesn't know better. Mischa is Mischa. She knows. I voted Mischa.
Posted by: Nicole | Mar 31, 2008 11:03:45 AM
I went with Paris. Mischa occasionally looks pretty; Paris NEVER does, just marginally less tacky. And I DON'T think she believes it's deliberately outlandish -- I think Paris honestly thinks she always looks good in that crap.
Posted by: Amy | Mar 31, 2008 11:05:27 AM
Paris Hilton is a walking blow-up doll (read: airhead), so consistantly putting together great outfits is pretty hard for her. But the fact that she occasionally pulls it together is enought for me to take her off the chopping block. Mischa Barton, however, dated Brandon Davis. If that's not a harbinger of horrible taste, I don't know what is.
Posted by: Noelle | Mar 31, 2008 11:08:30 AM
A previous poster said it all when she commented that Paris had "fug of the soul". Who can top that? Also, even though I know the fug girls are practically perfect in every way, I just cannot fathom that the most recent "fug or fab" photo of the blond and bizarre looking woman labeled Mischa Barton is actually Mischa Barton. She looks 10 years older and, definitely, fug. But not fug to the soul.
Posted by: Leah | Mar 31, 2008 11:10:50 AM
Do you guys really think Paris Hilton is more fug than Mischa Barton? Seriously? Paris may be more fug on the inside, but she will NEVER be as fug as Mischa on the outside. Never.
Mischa wears high waisted pants, high waisted SHORTS, hot pink pumps with black tights, pilgrim dresses, plaid diapers, linen suspendered pants. You guys! Paris can't even compete with that... This is very unfortunate.
Posted by: Jessie | Mar 31, 2008 11:17:22 AM
Sorry, but our gal Mischa is playing at the two dollar table, hoping that she'll be able to make the World Series of Fug by winning enough satellite online games. La Hilton is already at the final table and All In, baby.
Posted by: SidheDevil | Mar 31, 2008 11:18:25 AM
Paris, it's not like she's got anything better to do, so she seriously doesn't have an excuse. Mischa occasionally even shows up looking cute, you know puts some effort in. Paris is just... paris. nuff said
Posted by: jolijn | Mar 31, 2008 11:19:29 AM
I'd say the vote has to go to Mushy Fartone (as Perez Hilton wittily calls Mischa. He's so CLASSY.). Paris may often look like she covered her body in superglue and ran around her closet until enough clothing stuck to her body, but the girl changes her outfit about 12 times a day. With that staggeringly large number of clothing combinations, the bad-to-good ratio just has to work out to an average of mediocre-but-not-true-fug-ness....right?
Posted by: Jackson | Mar 31, 2008 11:19:50 AM
I think Mischa would be really hurt to "win" this. Paris, on the other hand seems impervious to feeling, well, anything, and is far too vapid to understand that "winning" is a slam. Vote to Paris for inner fuggliness as well as outer, and for failing to use her boatloads of time, money and notoriety for worthwhile charitable causes.
Posted by: Critter | Mar 31, 2008 11:21:54 AM
Come on, people! Mischa Barton wears high waisted pants and diapers! Paris is tacky - Mischa is fug.
Posted by: Tess | Mar 31, 2008 11:31:29 AM
Wow. As I read the blog for paris and her "Fashion Plates" inspired dress, I clicked on the link and was taken to a fabulos site that took me back oh, about 20 years. Hey, I owned Fashion Plates at one time, and Paris' dress does TOTALLY look like something "designed" after I had OD'd on cherry Kool-Aid and Pixie Stix.
Posted by: Kraizeekatt | Mar 31, 2008 11:37:52 AM
I am voting for Paris, because Mischa seems like she is trying to be fashion forward, but still herself most of the time. Paris just dresses for attention
Posted by: lambman | Mar 31, 2008 11:42:09 AM
I'm kind of sad about this, but I know that P. Hilt. will take it in a walk. La Bart had a good run, but there's no room for amateurs in the final four.
Posted by: Cassie | Mar 31, 2008 11:53:48 AM
bai ling and chloe sevigny against one another already? this is bad! i was hoping to see those two at one another in the final!! jokes - but seriously, i would have liked that.
Posted by: Will | Mar 31, 2008 11:54:40 AM
Mischa started the high waisted pants return from hell! She must pay for her fug.
Posted by: Gabrielle | Mar 31, 2008 11:56:31 AM
As much as I would LOVE to see Paris go to a FAR FAR AWAY land never to be seen or heard from again, I must vote for her. This creature not only puts her face (Dear God that face) on the clothes she wears but she also tries to sell said clothes to the rest of the world in an insidious plot to rule the fug world. Acknowledging her FUG will end her evil scheme.
Mischa, just needs to a.) pay attention to the size of her clothes and b.) stop buying her clothes from the Minnie Mouse reject bin at the Salvation Army.
Posted by: M | Mar 31, 2008 12:03:52 PM
If Mischa would put the bong down for a minute I think that she would dress much better. C'mon ya know that she had to be totally stoned out of her mind when she donned high-waisted pants for the first time, and second, and third. She gets off the weed and she has a shot at unfugging herself.
Paris has no excuse, she revels in her fug. I hate giving her my vote but what can I do???? Even if P is chemically altered and she cleaned up her act she would still fug up the world.
Posted by: Tara | Mar 31, 2008 12:16:32 PM
MY EYES! MY EYES!
Mishca NEEEEEEEEDS this award. She still has a chance to stop. the. fug. She seems relatively responsible and smrt (I mean compared to Paris, people, not you or I.) And maybe if she gets bitch slapped by the fug title, she will WAKE UP AND LISTEN that even if you are tall and thin, fug WILL make you look SHORT AND STUMPY.
Paris, on the other hand, is too far gone. No matter what award she wins, she's still going to end up shooting herion in a Burger King bathroom until she passes out in a pool of her own vomit. And that, can only be an improvement to whatever fug she was going to force upon the world that night.
Posted by: Liz Wakefield | Mar 31, 2008 12:19:26 PM
I'm kind of in love with everyone that writes in these comment sections. When this is all over and (sadly) done with, shall we all meet up at the bar to celebrate?
Posted by: Megan | Mar 31, 2008 12:22:17 PM
I just desperately hope we don't end up with a Bai, Paris, Peldon, Posh Final 4 situation because I don't think we should be rewardin these screaming-for-attention fuggers. I feel like they would be happy about it, and that it would validate their (non)personas, and I just can't do that.
But, maybe they'd take it as a challenge to show up somewhere in even crazier get-ups which bring more fuggery our way.
What do you guys think? Is shameless, self-promoting fug still acceptable fug? Or is it better to focus on unintentional fugging?
Posted by: na | Mar 31, 2008 12:22:18 PM
Mischa. Because she is presented as a fashion adventurer, when in fact she is a fashion dumpster.
Posted by: KPod | Mar 31, 2008 12:22:36 PM
The previous comment needs a 'would'-- can't stand my own bad grammar.
Posted by: na | Mar 31, 2008 12:24:14 PM
MY EYES! MY EYES!
Mishca NEEEEEEEEDS this award. She still has a chance to stop. the. fug. She seems relatively responsible and smrt (I mean compared to Paris, people, not you or I.) And maybe if she gets bitch slapped by the fug title, she will WAKE UP AND LISTEN that even if you are tall and thin, fug WILL make you look SHORT AND STUMPY.
Paris, on the other hand, is too far gone. No matter what award she wins, she's still going to end up shooting herion in a Burger King bathroom until she passes out in a pool of her own vomit. And that, can only be an improvement to whatever fug she was going to force upon the world that night.
Posted by: Liz Wakefield | Mar 31, 2008 12:30:08 PM
Paris all the way in this round. She is fuggly inside and out PERIOD. How many times can someone wear her own face on her shirt? And you just know that she made Britney wear that awful green dress, not to mention no underwear.
Poor little Mischa seems ok. She makes some horrible choices, both in general and for her body type in particular (maybe some of that is due to some kind of "herbal supplement"). But, she's no match for a professional like Paris Hilton.
Still, I don't think Paris stands a chance at progressing past the next stage.
Posted by: jk | Mar 31, 2008 12:31:36 PM
Paris' fugness is just part of who (or what) she is. Without it she's nothing. But Mischa just f's up, which got my vote. It's very much a toss-up though. A very fun toss-up.
Posted by: Debbi | Mar 31, 2008 12:37:44 PM
Paris. No matter how unexpectedly cute the dress, her skankiness radiates from her ruining the overall look.
Posted by: tackytacky | Mar 31, 2008 12:40:23 PM
I have nothing helpful to add except that I kind of really love the "sometimes she looks good" dress example on Mischa. I am not a pink person, so you know it's got to be fairly fantastic to get me interested.
Posted by: kerminator | Mar 31, 2008 12:48:04 PM
Much as I loathe to give Hilton the attention, I have never ever seen her look attractive. Not even in clothes that are not actually affronts to humanity.
Posted by: Manon | Mar 31, 2008 12:49:48 PM
Though, I dislike most of what Paris wears with a passion, I hate EVERY ill-fitting garment that Barton wears. Well, one time a year or so ago she wore an ecru gown that looked nice...
Posted by: Solaera | Mar 31, 2008 1:16:23 PM
This was difficult. Both make so many poor choices but at least Barton has a bit of beauty to fall back on even if it is ruined by fug.
Paris is a skanky, hot mess who believes she is perfect in every way. She is a festering boil on the flesh of humanity and comes by her fug naturally. Barton has to work for it.
Paris can be the only victor in this fight.
Posted by: jen310 | Mar 31, 2008 1:18:52 PM
So, I know that no one here (myself included) actually likes Paris Hilton, but at least her hair and makeup are always done.
Yes, that usually means done in the kind of plastic-y way which implies that she showed a Barbie from the 1980s to her stylist and said, "Me want this," but at least the effort has been made. I can't remember a single time where I looked at Mischa's hair and makeup and said, "She looks nice/healthy." Gotta go with Barton for the one-two punch of fug clothes and styling.
Posted by: Ellie | Mar 31, 2008 1:21:42 PM
OMG. Fashion Plates. Many an hour in the early 80s was spent with those things. Many of my designs that I was SURE my mother threw away have since appeared on Bai Ling.
Posted by: pippa | Mar 31, 2008 1:28:30 PM
Mischa - for THOSE high-waisted jeans. Ugh!
Posted by: Emma | Mar 31, 2008 1:43:50 PM
Paris Hilton.. Because I just love Mischa, and she does look slightly awkward at times, but really, she looks beautiful most of the time and I love her!
Posted by: Sanne | Mar 31, 2008 1:57:39 PM
Pleeeeeeeeeeeease, it's Hilton. Barton doesn't hold a candle to that nuttery.
Posted by: Mags | Mar 31, 2008 2:15:44 PM
I have to vote for Paris. I mean, the woman actually got David FREAKING Letterman to back off! The first time she was on his show, he treated her like the moron she is, the second time he was SO-O-O-O-O whipped. I thought he was gonna kiss her butt for sure.
Posted by: Sharon | Mar 31, 2008 2:18:42 PM
C'mon ladies, please vote for the fug and not for the person you don't like. Mischa is so clearly a master of fug that you must reallllllly not like Paris Hilton to miss it. For f@#cks sake, she wore freaking pajama bottoms out, how can you not vote for Mischa?! In a perfect world, Mischa, Courtney Peldon, Bai Ling and Sevigny would meet on the red carpet somewhere and cancel each other out of existence. Who knows, maybe the process would transport them to some "Heavy Metal" world wherein they claw each others eyes out to get to wear the Loknar.
Posted by: Christopher | Mar 31, 2008 2:24:00 PM
Mischa at her fugliest looks happy, so I think she's just following her (misguided) sense of style and comfort and wearing what she really likes. Wheras Paris gives of the vibe of trying very, very hard to get attention all the live-long day. IMO, attention-seeking is a fuglier attitude than is making oneself happy, therefore I had no choice but to vote Paris.
Posted by: loonytick | Mar 31, 2008 2:24:09 PM
Paris wins simply for her animated dog vomit personality.
Posted by: Yeah, I Said It | Mar 31, 2008 2:41:00 PM
paris all the way! (nothing new for her!)
Posted by: nikkol | Mar 31, 2008 2:43:09 PM
OH MY FUGGING GOD, PEOPLE!!!! I sssoooo wanted Coop to annihilate Paris! She deserves it in a billion ways!
See, Paris is simply a retarded whore with a bigass credit limit and no inkling of sophistication , whereas MISCHA BARTON IS SERIOUSLY PRETTY with a potential for sophistication that always falls so tragically below par.
She's also a crappalicious actress, but this isn's the Fugscars or whatever. So I shall move on.
I remember the first time I ever saw The O.C. I was like, "that girl is f*cking stunning. I would skin one of my cats for her cheekbones and eye color. And sprinkling of freckles." I mean, I wouldn't skin one of my cats, obviously, but I remember thinking that Mischa has this sort of Mod 60's huge-eyed, swingy-haired loveliness. She just CANNOT EMPHASIZE IT AT ALL. She pretty much dresses to make her lanky (and, as some have cruelly -- but truthfully -- pointed out, cellulite-ridden skinny/fat) body look as HEINOUS as possible.
Girlfriend has that disease where your self-perception is, like, the ANTITHESIS of how others percieve you. She probably thinks she's an orgasm-inducing glamazon in those Mrs. Roper Muu Muus.
But at least she's not a herpes-infested blight to American Culture and Humanity in General!
God, I hate Paris. My hatred for The Wonk is becoming a personal hindrance -- so heavy it's hard to bear sometimes. Sweet, merciful, benevolent Lord, please hit our Paris Whitney Hilton with the speediest train! And set that train on fire, while you're at it.
I don't wanna give Paris effing Hilton any award. Unless it posthumous.
Posted by: Ernestine | Mar 31, 2008 2:51:37 PM
If I believed that voting for P would actually, literally cause her to disappear in a skank- scented vapor of humiliation, I would cast my vote for her. Alas, I fear she would only gain power and the apocalypse would be upon us.
Posted by: Shelley | Mar 31, 2008 2:52:08 PM
l l
l l
l llllllllllllllll l "ode to mischa barton"
l lxl l
l ll l
ll ll ll
lll ll lll
ll ll ll
ll ll V ll ll
l l l l
Posted by: no1really | Mar 31, 2008 3:02:11 PM
Mischa all the way. That polterwang is almost too much to handle.
Posted by: Gabby | Mar 31, 2008 3:02:24 PM
It's going to be Hilton vs. Ling, isn't it? The other 62 (or is it 63?) were just preliminaries.
Posted by: djheydt | Mar 31, 2008 3:03:47 PM
I've enjoyed the discussion and have wavered back and forth all day. The tipping factor for me is that Mischa just seems to be a sort of sweet, pretty girl who dresses really badly and some intern at Entertainment Tonight floated the idea that she's a fashion icon which unfortunately caught on. But Paris is synonymous with "come within 30 feet of me and catch at least two STDs" and proud of it. And she really thinks everyone wants to be her. Plus, her very public jailhouse conversion to altruism and instantaneous forgetting all about it once the limo picked her up shows fug of such soulless depth that I finally had to vote for P.
Posted by: MB | Mar 31, 2008 3:19:18 PM
Well, it finally happened. I didn't think it was possible to vote against Paris (even if she had to eventually face Bai Ling and/or Chloe Sevigny), but here I am doing it. I vote for Mischa, like many others, on the basis of she should know better, and to punish her, as I intend to punish La Sevigny, for her "I'm so forward I can wear anything" 'tude.
Look, I'm a man, and while I know intellectually that Paris is a total skank, I know (if I were single) I would go there given the opportunity and some good antiseptic for my "associate" afterwards. Because she's hot in a way we men can't really explain, and probably shouldn't. So no matter how fug she is, how horrible a person, she's still not as bad as Mischa.
That was difficult for me. But I think I grew (no pun intended).
Posted by: Mitch Strand | Mar 31, 2008 3:21:38 PM
I must agree that deciding between Paris and Mischa is almost too difficult, but being reminded of many of my own bad-yet-awesome afternoon creations with Fashion Plates is worth the pressure of Fug Madness 2008!
Posted by: Orangeandpink | Mar 31, 2008 3:37:23 PM
mischa has made soooooo many gawd awful choices and you pair up a soo soo bad sunday afternoon dress mischa sports against the monster nature of that dress paris has found herself fit to wear? that was wrong. surely yall could've found something mischa has worn in the past to put up against the P. this contest is so bought and paid for by my bff paris. nuff said.
Posted by: deanna | Mar 31, 2008 3:45:05 PM
Barton:
I applaud you - seriously! - for running YOU KNOW WHO out of the fug race. Thank you, thank you, thank you. If I had to look at one more vacant smile and barbie boob clevage on that vapid she-idiot - not to mention HE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED - I might have lost all hope in humanity, the world, etc.
However, I applaud you EVEN MORE for your uncanny ability to pull off colors that would make most of us look like we'd spent the night with our head in a toilet bowl:
http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/go_fug_yourself/2007/03/well_played_mis.html
Ergo, I can not vote for you this round. Better luck next year - I have all the faith in the world that you (and the waists of your pants) will rise to the occasion.
Posted by: lelo | Mar 31, 2008 3:59:30 PM
I agree with Gabby: the polterwang (under a jumpsuit, no less) is heinous. The fact that Paris is winning this breaks my fugging heart :(
Posted by: Liz | Mar 31, 2008 4:00:54 PM
Barton, part deux:
Pardon my bad cutting and pasting:
http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/go_fug_yourself/2007/03/well_played_mis.html
Posted by: lelo | Mar 31, 2008 4:04:33 PM
I voted for Micha. Paris is definately fug...but she's also sort of mentally challenged. Also, everyone laughs at Paris...Micha on the other hand, is sometimes referred to as a style icon. I don't think anyone (other than a few Stupid Spoiled Whores in middle school, perhaps) thinks Paris Hilton is a style icon.
Posted by: Jaime B. | Mar 31, 2008 4:17:15 PM
Deanna, I linked to the entire archives of both of them -- should give plenty of ammo for both girls.
Posted by: Jessica | Mar 31, 2008 4:25:58 PM
The tidal wave of nausea and jaundice that rises up inside all womankind at the sight of Paris Hilton cannot be denied. As for those unwilling to lend Paris even more notoriety, if only for her fug, take comfort in the fact that she will never withstand the torrential fug of Sev or Bai Ling.
Posted by: maria | Mar 31, 2008 4:40:44 PM
But.. But Mischa is young, right? She'll eventually -hopefully- get it together. This could be just a phase. (But I'll face it: It would be whole lot easier to defend Mischa Barton if the diaper shorts incident had never taken place.)
Paris! With Paris, I fear it's what catches her attention at that minute. She grabs it and puts it on. I'm pretty sure we'd be seeing red wigs, giant shoes and a slightly scary smile on her if she dated Ronald McDonald.
Posted by: Bakanel | Mar 31, 2008 5:36:51 PM
I know, I know. I'm voting for Paris over Mischa not because of her all-round fugness (though it's there, obviously), but because I think she's a vile hoebag with no soul. Whereas Mischa seems kind of nice. But that's a good enough reason, right? Right?
Posted by: Caramia | Mar 31, 2008 5:52:31 PM
Paris. Also, she's on 69%. Tee hee.
Posted by: Rach | Mar 31, 2008 6:15:41 PM
I'm going to have to vote for Mischa, I think Paris knows what she's doing when she shows up somewhere looking stupid, she does it all for the attention. Barton I think really thinks she has great fashion sense.
Posted by: Carolyn | Mar 31, 2008 6:25:37 PM
This was an intense battle, but after diligently perusing the archives ("Paris & Nicky Hilton" and "Mischa Barton/The O.C. Gang") I had to go with Paris, as she had a much less proportionate well-playeds:fugging terrible ratio than did Ms. Barton (who I agree is really exceptionally pretty and does by times happen to wear something half-decent). During my research, however, it occurred to me that if GFYHQ had more evidence of Samaire Armstrong's wardrobe decisions, she would no doubt prove a formidable opponent. The few archived pictures of her prove far fuglier than anything Mischa has even considered. So I, for one, am hoping for a mighty 2008 for Samaire; may she live up to even my loftiest expectations.
Posted by: Oregano | Mar 31, 2008 7:00:14 PM
Paris dresses badly, but in a tacky teenage way. Mischa just picks the worst, fugliest, *ugliest* stuff out of modern fashions and pairs it badly and accessorizes incompetently while taking herself seriously. I feel like she is permanent fug, whereas Paris is just a caricature who does it for attention.
Posted by: Sophia | Mar 31, 2008 7:01:52 PM
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE stop with the book references. We know you have a book but this is getting a little heavy handed. "A little" in the way that Paris and Mischa both look "a little" fug from time to time.
Posted by: Ginger | Mar 31, 2008 7:39:40 PM
This was a tough won. MiBart, joyfully embracing every scrap of fug from diapers to Thanksgiving-themed pageant costumes? Or la Hilton, raised in the capitals of Europe and yet unable to resist postering her attire with her own face? So much fug, only one vote.
I finally had to give it to P.Hilt, for one reason. She is the Typhoid Mary of Fug: not only does she wear the stuff, but she "designs" and MARKETS it, spreading the vile plague of her fugosity to unsuspecting and poorly attired young people. In the end, I had to think of the children.
Posted by: Arolem | Mar 31, 2008 8:09:11 PM
Oh my gosh! Fashion Plates! They were the highlight of Keri Higgins' legendary 4th grade sleepovers. That and jumping off the couch during Milli Vanilli songs.
Posted by: lovessharon | Mar 31, 2008 8:23:25 PM
FASHION PLATES!!!!!!! OMG! I am voting for Paris just because of the *Fashion Plates* reference!!!!!!! I loved those things!
Posted by: Wendy | Mar 31, 2008 9:06:03 PM
Paris looks at herself in the mirror every day and says, "Yeah, I'd hit that."
And so would I. Flat out, with my open palm.
Posted by: Auntie Em | Mar 31, 2008 10:17:39 PM
Heeheehee! Nice one, Auntie Em!
Posted by: Loob | Mar 31, 2008 10:24:03 PM
HA! Now every time I see Paris, I will think "Fug of the Soul" (before, I thought "Ew, STDs"). But I must agree Paris is the obvious winner, because she brings the fug on herself. Mischa is a beautiful but stupid girl who has no idea what looks good on her, and frequently stumbles into some serious, bag-shaped mistakes. But Paris INTENTIONALLY dresses like a character from a Disney-themed brothel in hell. On purpose. This is truly fug, yes?
Posted by: megan | Mar 31, 2008 10:27:58 PM
Vote Paris! If we give her something shiny she will go play and leave the grown-ups to do serious stuff.
Posted by: DC | Mar 31, 2008 10:29:11 PM
I have a deep rooted hatred for mishcainawefhas barton, or however you spell it. Paris could never live up to it, but points for trying lady, points for trying. It all began with an interview she did at a charity event, she couldn't remember what charity it was but she was really excited about her stupid vintage sparkle top. People magazine would never lie to me, now would they? Would they?
Posted by: karly | Apr 1, 2008 12:16:20 AM
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