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May 05, 2008

The Fug Whisperer: Part A Lot

Recent events on The Ghost Whisperer can not be ignored. No, I don't mean how they Rapidly Aged Camryn Manheim's son so that he can now date girls who have vindictive ghosts attached to them, or how Melinda seems to have abandoned the hilariously over-the-top nightgowns, bed-jackets and ballgowns of yore and now argues with the vindictive ghosts attached to the girlfriends of her employees while looking generally attractive and youthful and well-dressed-ish (for god's sake, please don't anyone actually LISTEN to us when we mock your beehives and bed-jackets. Don't you know by now that when I say,  "Dude, she's WEARING a LACE NIGHTGOWN to BINGO with a BOX on her head and a CUCKOO CLOCK for a PURSE!"  it actually means, "I love you"?).  No, this time I am speaking of something that was brought to my attention by several readers and at least one close friend.

Picture it: Southern California, 2008. I am wearing a box on my head, having just come home from bingo, and am settling in for a Sunday night marathon of all the episodes of Greek that have built up on my TiVo.  Just innocently looking forward to spending some quality time with that delightful Spencer Grammar and some moonshine. Then I check our GFY email to find several missives regarding Nikki Cox's appearance on The Ghost Whisperer this week, which inspired the following from your fellow readers:  several instances of "WTF??!!!?", a few folks wailing, "WHYY?!?! Right?", a brief but apt note opining, "IT'S LIKE THEY ATE HER HEAD," several comments indicating that the individual in question could neither look directly at her NOR look away, and one person who simply said, "OMG."

And I read these emails and I thought, "Nikki Cox is really cute! What's going on? And how bad could it be?"

Then I turned on the TV to this:


Those are some really big new lips. I...seriously can not wrap my head around this one, I have to say. Nikki Cox is so genetically blessed. She's been dishy since the beginning of time. She needed lip augmentation like I need another box of wine (i.e: NOT AT ALL).  The whole time I was watching this episode, I kept remembering a letter that ran in one of the beauty advice columns in Sassy Magazine like a hundred years ago, which I have never forgotten, mostly because it was so funny. Namely, the writer felt her lips were too thin but she couldn't afford collagen. She asked if she could get the same effect if she just bashed her lips in with a brick really hard. Needless to say, Sassy did not think this was advisable. And yet I feel like Nikki Cox somehow stumbled across that letter while cleaning out her vintage magazine collection and thought, "Huh. That kid might have something there."  At any rate, let's hope these smackers are as temporary as brick-induced ones, shall we? The alternative is too depressing to contemplate. Kind of like a Ghost Whisperer without any beehives. Or, as one of you said, "OMGWTF."

Posted by Jessica at 09:14 AM | Permalink


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